


'Til someone loses their rights

by Santaanawinds



Category: Bandom, fun.
Genre: Coming Out, F/F, Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-09-29
Packaged: 2019-01-05 16:55:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12193920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Santaanawinds/pseuds/Santaanawinds
Summary: It's the summer of 2009. The guys of fun. are busy just being a band. Emily's has something she hasn't told anyone before. The two of these worlds are about to collide.





	'Til someone loses their rights

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Millie/Grace is pure fiction, and any similarity to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The two magazines I mention, 'Shout Out' and the ironically named 'Closet' are both fictitious, too. The Ally Coalition, however, is totally real and worth while supporting if you can.

It's a drunken confession one night in 2009.    
  
She and Nattie went out to hit up a club or two and she's way beyond having serious conversations right now, but it falls off her tongue anyway, along with the weight on her chest that's been making it hard to breathe.   
Emily's gay. She says it with her hands on his shoulders, staring him straight in the face.   
'Nattie, I'm gay. I, I like girls.' He takes her hand in his, and spins her around and they go back to dancing like they were. They dance until she's about to fall down, and then he takes her home and crashes on her couch.  
  
She wakes up before him and she's feeling rough after drinking so much last night. She takes a shower, blow dries her hair and brushes her teeth before Nattie's awake. Now, they’re going to be late, and she’s rushing around like a headless chicken trying to get ready.   
‘Hey. About what you said last night, I-I just wanted to tell you that-‘ Nattie started as she threw on her leather jacket and depressed the bread into the toaster.   
‘We’re going to be late. Better get a move on.’ She skulls OJ and tries to put her shoes on with her other hand, praying he keeps his mouth shut about her little slip of the tongue. She offers him the carton, he declines with a shake of his head.   
‘I just wanted to tell you it’s alright. That you’re gay, it’s alright.’ She stops short. He hadn’t said anything last night, she thought that maybe-  
‘It is?’ Unsure, she finishes the carton with a furrowed brow and dumps it in the sink.   
‘Yeah. It doesn’t change anything, and no one’s going to care.’  
‘Wait, what? No, I’m not telling anybody.’  
‘Anyone? At all?’ The toaster starts to smoke. She swears under her breath and pushes the button on the side.   
‘No.’ She hadn’t even meant to tell him. ‘No one knows yet, so let’s keep it between us, okay?’ She deposits the charcoaled bread on to the side board and abandons the concept of breakfast.   
‘Sure. Thanks for…thanks for telling me.’ Is that what you say when someone comes out? Nattie didn’t know. They get texts then, from the guys. They’re late. ‘I know you don’t want to now, but I think it’d be okay if you told them sometime, like, I really don’t think they’d mind.’  
‘Thanks.’ She hugs him briefly and then they’re on their way to work like nothing ever happened.   
  
It’s a while before it’s brought up again, maybe the winter of 2011. She invites Nattie and Will over for dinner. They don’t know why she’s holding off on serving, until the doorbell rings. She walks down the hall to answer the door and behind it is a perky brunette with short hair and a denim jacket. She hands Emily some flowers, kisses her cheek, and looks for somewhere to put the bottle of wine she’s brought with her.   
‘Come in, sit down, I’ll introduce you.’ They walk back to the table, where the boys stand up from their places.   
  
‘Amelia Grace, this is Will and Nattie, my best friends. Will and Nattie, this is Amelia Grace. My girlfriend.’ Nattie smiles, a wide, genuine smile and extends his hand.   
‘She didn’t mention you were a model. Nice to meet you, Amelia Grace.’  
‘My friends call me Millie, this one calls me Grace.’ She pointed to Emily. ‘You’ve seen my campaign?’ He had not.   
‘Oh, you actually do model, then?’ He wasn’t surprised. Millie was beautiful and her looks complimented Emily’s well.   
‘Didn’t you tell them anything about me?’ She asks Emily. But she’s not upset, judging by the smile on her face. ‘A few things here and there. Bus stops, mostly. Jeans ads, that sort of thing.’ Emily’s looking at Will, who still hasn’t said…well, anything, actually. She shoots him a Look.   
‘Uh, good to meet you, Millie. I’m Will, and apparently that’s Emily.’ He shakes Millie’s hand and sits down next to Nattie and Millie’s the only one who misses how Nattie steps on Will’s foot, applying just enough pressure for the pain to cross Will’s face for the briefest of moments.   
  
‘I’m just going to go put these in water, then I’ll serve. Will, you want to help?’ They get into the kitchen and Emily trims the stems of the flowers and finds a glass that could be big enough to work as a vase.   
‘Did he know?’ Will asks.   
‘He was the first one I told about Grace.’ She fills the glass with water and a little sugar before arranging the flowers.   
‘I mean, that you like girls or whatever.’  
‘Yeah. I told him that first, too.’ She retrieves the butter from the fridge and the bread from the counter, fresh baked this afternoon, and hands them off to Will.   
‘So I was the only one who didn’t haven’t a clue?’  
‘What? You knew I was gay.’ She grabbed the pan of lasagna from the oven, and sat it on the stove.   
‘No, I didn’t.’   
‘We watched ‘Milk’ and talked gay rights for hours! I dropped huge hints! When you never said anything, I just assumed you were being cool.’ She’s turned to get two wine glasses from the cupboard (Nattie and Will didn’t drink).   
‘I really didn’t know.’   
‘So that’s what that was about?’ She was of course referring to his earlier jibe about meeting her to her girlfriend.   
‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it, just…surprised, I guess. I love you same as I always have.’ He takes the wine glasses from her and kisses her cheek. ‘C’mon chef, food's getting cold.’ They return to the table and serve. Millie and Nattie were getting along like a house on fire, and more than once during the meal, she took Emily’s hand, or shot her a smile that was the definition of ‘fond’.   
  
They answered all the usual questions, ‘How long have you been together?’, ‘How did you meet?’, and fell about laughing when Millie asked how long Nattie and Will had been dating.   
‘What? What’d I say?’  
‘They’re heterosexual life partners.’  
‘Oh. You guys seem so perfect together, I just assumed…’ she blushed.   
‘It’s ok, so did I…and everyone at work. I’m pretty sure even their moms think they’re together.’ Emily supplies.   
It was a great evening, and she was very happy to be out to them and get to show off her beautiful partner. She felt this was a girl she could easily fall in love with.   
  
That Spring, Millie’s campaign blew up and so did her career. She made a couple of points about gay rights on the internet and now every magazine and website seemed to be lining up to interview her. Not to mention the rumors. She brought it up one morning as she was dropping Emily off in her flashy black car. She pulled in to the curb and cut the engine.   
‘I think I want to come out. I mean, my family and friends already know, my publicist, my agent. But as soon as I do, paps are going to circle like vultures and I don’t want you to get outed before you’re ready.’ So far, they’d enjoyed a relationship in obscurity, where they could hold hands and kiss in public if it felt safe. Well, not anymore at any rate.   
‘I…’ Emily didn’t want to stop Millie from coming out, but she hadn’t come out at home or work yet. ‘I’m not embarrassed or ashamed. I just haven’t told some people yet.’ Or, like, anyone other than Will and Nattie.   
‘It’s just a thought.’ Emily looked at her watch.   
‘Ugh, I’m going to be late. We can talk about this after work? Milkshakes at that place on the corner? I know you can’t resist the malt.’ She smiled.   
‘Sure. Love you.’ Emily climbed out of the car, then leaned back in through the window to kiss her.   
‘Love you too.’ She stood back and watched Millie drive away. Suddenly, she’s reminded that they’re 6 months this weekend and she needs to figure out how to present her surprise. She can fine tune it later; she really will be late if she doesn’t get inside.   
  
‘Hey guys.’  
‘Hey Emily.’ They chorus.   
‘Hey, who is that with the flashy car that’s been dropping you off?’ Jack questions.   
‘My partner.’   
‘Dating a movie star? Should we worry that he’s going to sweep you off your feet, buy you a small Caribbean island and then we’ll never see you again? Are we going to have to start auditioning?’ Jack’s joking…she thinks.   
‘Close, no, and definitely not.’  
‘Then what does he do?’ Nate asked.   
‘Drives a flashy car to drop me off at work. Shall we?’ She picks up her guitar and starts to tune. She sees Nattie and Will try not to smile because they know what Emily’s girlfriend really does.   
  


That afternoon, they discuss it over milkshakes and decide that Millie will do the article soon, after all, with no mention of Emily’s name. Emily decides to bring up their anniversary.   
‘Did you keep this weekend free?’ Millie had said she’d try.   
‘I did. And what, pray tell, might you need me for?’  
‘Pack for nice weather. I have a getaway booked. There’s this great little BnB not far from where I grew up and I was thinking I could show you the place.’  
‘Aww, Emmy, that sounds amazing. The way you talk about it, I’ve wanted to see it for months.’ Millie’s heart’s melted like the malt in her glass.   
‘I was also thinking that maybe you wanted to meet my mom and dad?’   
‘Yes, I’d love to!’ Emily, to be fair, had already met her girlfriend’s parents about a month and a half ago, and Millie had been very patient not to push.   
‘I’m so glad you’re okay with it, I was worried it’d be too much.’   
‘No, it’s lovely.’ The place was quiet and they were in a back corner. With no one looking, Millie reached over the table and kissed her, close-mouthed and sweet.   
  
Emily calls her mom and dad that evening. She teaches them over the phone how to set up a Skype account, and then she sets up her computer and texts Nattie while she waits for it to be after dinner their time.  
‘I’m about to come out to my parents.’ He texts back three times.   
‘That’s huge! Good luck!  
I mean I’m sure it’ll go fine, but good vibes just in case.  
Do you want me to come over?’ She answers the last one.   
‘Would you?’  
‘Be there in ten.’ She really loves Nattie. It’s 8 o’clock. They’ll be eating dinner. Half an hour and then they’ll call and the words ‘Mom, Dad, I’m gay’ absolutely have to come out of her mouth. She’s already told them she’ll see them on Sunday. She sighs in relief when the doorbell rings and she’s not alone going out of her mind about it anymore. She breathes and opens the door.   
  
‘You okay?’  
‘My heart is beating out of my chest, and I probably shouldn’t pick up anything breakable right now, but besides that, yeah.’ She wipes her shaking, sweaty palms on her jeans.   
‘Are they here?’ He drops his voice to a whisper.   
‘No, they’re going to call me soon. I’m terrified.’   
‘At least you’re sober this time.’ She cracked a smile as she remembered how it had taken half a liquor store and a drunken accident for her to tell anyone she was gay.   
‘Yeah. That’s progress.’ The last actual coming out she had done was telling Will, which had gone a little too smoothly and in the end, had turned out that he hadn’t quite grasped what she was getting at. This time, she needed to be very, very clear.   
  
Nattie got her a glass of water and made her sit down for a minute and breathe.   
‘It’s just your mom and dad right? You’ve known them all your life.’ She nodded. ‘And they love you and want you to be happy.’ She nodded again.   
‘Yeah. You’re right. It’ll be fine. It’s not like I can back out now, anyway. I’m taking Grace out to meet them on Sunday.’   
‘That’s a big step, things getting serious?’   
‘Well, we already said ‘I love you’, and it HAS been 6 months this week.’ Now the smile was back on her face.   
‘You seem really happy.’  
‘I am.’ So much more than she ever was before she came out to herself.   
‘I’m happy for you.’   
‘Thanks.’ Her computer was ringing. That was her parent’s contact on the screen. She visibly tensed.   
‘It’ll be ok.’ Nattie says, hugging her for a moment and then moving away from the camera. He sits in the corner, playing on his phone, just to be someone in the room who’s already on her side.   
‘Thanks Nattie.’ She takes a breath. ‘Here goes nothing.’ She hits ‘answer’.   
  
‘Hi Mom, hi Dad.’   
‘Emily, sweetheart, how are you? Are you still coming this weekend?’  
‘Yes, Mom, I can’t wait. Uhm, I’m bringing a friend, ok?’   
‘Sure honey. One of the kids from the band?’ Her father asks.   
‘Not quite. A girl I’ve been hanging out with. Look, I need to say something.’   
‘Is something wrong?’ Her mom fretted.   
‘No. But there’s something I wanted to tell you.’   
‘Go on.’  
‘I-I’m.’  
‘Yes?’ That’s the thing with moms. One little hint of anything and they start pushing right away.   
‘I’m…this is really hard, so just, give me a second, okay?’ She takes a sip   
of water, blinks rapidly and starts again. ‘Uh, I need to tell you that-‘  
‘Just tell us, honey. Whatever it is can’t be that bad.’ She hopes her Dad means that as he interrupts to hurry her along.   
‘I’m scared, okay, and I’m trying to do this right.’ She pauses, looks over at Nattie, and exhales the breath she’s been holding when he gives her a nod, a nonverbal ‘you can do this’, and a warm smile. She blinks the tears from her eyes, takes another deep breath, and lets it out in one go.   
  
‘I’m gay.’ Where there was crushing fear, she is numb, and where her cheeks were dry, there are rivers. ‘I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you; I didn’t know how.’   
‘But you dated boys. You were engaged to Justin.’ Her dad says, confused. That’s a whole other story that she doesn’t want to explain to her parents.   
‘And I loved him, I did. Just not in the way you should love someone you’re going to marry.’   
‘Are you seeing someone?’ He asks.   
‘Yeah, her name is Millie. I think you’d really like her.’   
‘Is that who you’re bringing on Sunday?’   
‘Yeah.’   
‘You know you can tell your old Dad anything, right Princess?’  
‘Yes, Dad. I know.’   
‘We still love you, and we’ll support you. Just don’t go cutting all your pretty long hair off.’ She rolls her eyes at what she’s pretty sure is just a joke.   
‘Thanks, Dad. I think.’  
‘Does she make you happy?’ That’s the first thing her mom has said in what feels like a literal age since she came out, but what’s probably only a few minutes.   
‘Yes. I love her.’ She’s nodding and still wiping tears from her face, but the rivulets keep up a steady pace.   
‘That’s all I want for you. I can’t wait to meet her. I love you, Emily.’  
‘I love you too, Mom. Love you, Dad.’ She sniffs.   
‘I love you Princess. See you Sunday.’  
‘Bye.’  
‘Bye.’ They disconnect the call and now she’s staring at the empty screen. She just did that. She just came out to her parents and they don’t hate her, they aren’t disgusted by her.   
  
Nattie is totally incapable of watching a friend cry and not do anything about it. He sits down next to her and pulls her into his arms.   
‘No! I’m gonna get snot all over your shirt.’  
‘It’ll wash out.’ She chuckles into the fabric.   
‘That’s gross. Thank you for being here.’   
‘You’re my friend. Where else would I be?’  
‘God, I love you, Nattie.’  
‘I’m proud of you.’   
‘I can’t believe I just did that. Holy crap, I’m out to my parents.’ It’s kind of hitting her all over again.   
‘How does it feel?’   
‘I’ll let you know when my heart stops racing.’ They grab a couple spoons and eat ice cream straight from the tub in front of netflix all night. Once her heart slows down, she tells him it just feels normal. Probably because she’s gotten used to the weight on her shoulders.   
  
She tells her girlfriend the next day.   
‘Grace, I came out to my mom and dad and they’re really excited to meet you. My mom just texted to ask if she should join PFLAG.’   
‘That’s great, baby! I’m glad they’re so supportive. Now there’s nothing to worry about going into this weekend.’ And there wasn’t. They had a wonderful time hidden away at the BnB, seeing Emily’s hometown like a couple of tourists, and even meeting her parents went really well.   
  
In June, Pride Month, when the article’s been published in the May issue of ‘Shout Out Magazine’, Millie calls Emily to let her know that her publicist and lawyers are trying to stop some photos and Emily’s name being leaked in this issue or the next, but the harder they try, the more push back they get, so if Emily has a grandma or something that reads gossip magazines, now might be the time to come out.   
‘Uh, I don’t think so, no.’   
Then she walks into work early, and Will’s flipping through the magazine Millie’s article is in.   
‘Hey. I found your…friends article.’ He corrects himself before he says ‘girlfriend’.   
‘Oh, cool.’ They read it together. It’s harmless, just like Grace had promised. It’s her saying that she’s gay, that she’s comfortable with who she is and that yes, she’s been seeing someone and they make her very happy. There’s also some other stuff about gay visibility in the industry and the ongoing fight for equal rights. She sends her a selfie of her and Will reading it. ‘How did you know which magazine she went with?’ Not even Emily had known until it came out last month, and she hadn’t mentioned it.   
‘I didn’t. It’s Nate’s.’   
‘Nattie doesn’t read gossip mags.’   
‘Ruess does.’   
‘Oh, shit.’ Just then, because the universe is cruel, Nate walks in with this month’s edition of that awful rag under his arm.  
  
‘Can I see that? Thanks Nate.’ She grabs it and scans the front cover. Nothing particularly incriminating, no mention of Millie. She opens it to the index, scanning for anything about ‘Amelia Grace, gay fashion icon’ and whatever else they had written in the last edition. There’s nothing. She breathes a sigh of relief (inwardly).   
‘Um, hey, my magazine?’   
‘Sorry, Nate. My friend’s got an article coming out in that soon and I couldn’t remember which issue she said it was. I got a little excited.’ She handed it back, satisfied that she wouldn’t be dragged out for at least another few weeks.   
‘Who is she?’  
‘Dog groomer to the stars. She once cut and washed Beau Obama.’ The lie slips off her tongue, like it’s perfectly practiced. She’d be scared of that if she wasn’t so relieved.   
‘Cool.’ As quickly as he was interested, he let it go.   
  
It’s only two days later when Millie calls in tears in the middle of practice.   
‘He-llo? Grace, slow down, I can’t understand you, what’s wrong?’ Emily turns white as a sheet and runs out, hand over her mouth. She ends up in the car park in the mid-summer heat, dry and slightly windy with her back against the brick wall. She wraps an arm around her knees and clutches her phone and tries not to cry, and then gives in until she hears the door open and looks up to see Will.   
‘Is she alright? Are you?’ Emily shakes her head. ‘Do you need to go? Do you need me to take you somewhere?’ Another head shake. ‘What happened?’ He sits next to her on the concrete.   
‘That crappy gossip rag that Nate’s reading. They’ve got stuff they’re threatening to publish.’  
‘Is it…bad for her career?’ It was a stab in the dark.   
‘No. But she’s been trying to stop them with her lawyers and stuff, and they’ve just told her they’re going to print anyway.’   
‘What are they going to print?’  
‘Pictures. My name. I’m barely even out to my mom and dad.’ He puts an arm around her.   
‘Nate.’ Will says, as it dawns on him that she’s not out at work. ‘Is there nothing they can do?’  
‘Nope. Not to stop them in time, anyway. The only reason we know about it is because they asked her for comment to try to confirm things, but she says they have a pretty good idea.’   
‘That’s awful. What are you going to do?’  
‘What can I do? Wait for him to buy that piece of junk next month? Open it up and say ‘oh, hey, there’s Emily’? I have to tell him, them. All three of them.’   
‘I’m sorry.’ Will may not understand why being gay is still an issue (because in his head, it just shouldn’t be), or why other people have to make it such a big deal, but Emily’s opening his eyes to it all and he’s angry that she’s been put in this position. It’s supposed to be your choice who you tell and now she doesn’t have one at all. ‘Is there something I can do?’   
‘You’re already doing it.’ She leans her head on his shoulder and texts Millie ‘Not your fault, Grace. I love you xx’   
  
By the time she’s gone back in, splashed her face and drunk from the faucet, Nattie’s back from his dentist appointment and she thinks Will’s filled him in, judging by the looks he keeps giving her. She’s just glad he’s here. Knowing she has allies right next to her makes what she’s about to do much easier.   
‘Can I just interrupt for a minute? It’ll only take a sec.’ There’s a murmur of agreement that sweeps through the room. There’s not really any fear in her heart, knowing as she does that nothing she says now will matter this time next month anyway.   
‘So um, I’m gay. And I’m only telling you this because my girlfriend is a model whose career is taking off. And her lawyers tried to stop them, but that trashy magazine you read is going to publish some exclusive stalker shots of us out together on a date. So in a few weeks’ time, the whole country will know, and I thought maybe I should come out before I get dragged out of the closet.’   
‘You don’t look like a lesbian.’ It’s obvious her boss didn’t mean for that to come out of his mouth.   
‘Nate, man, shut up.’ Jack chastises.   
‘Sorry.’  
‘It’s okay.’ She thinks he probably didn’t mean it that way.   
‘So, who’s your girlfriend?’ Jack asks. ‘Anyone we’ve heard of?’  
‘Amelia Grace. You’ve seen her on the bus stop around the corner.’   
‘Cool.’   
‘You should bring her to a show.’ Andrew says. ‘Or even just to practice sometime.’   
‘Maybe.’ Emily’s really not so sure about that.  
  
They play off-kilter until lunch, when Nattie tells her she’s badass and brave for coming out, just like that. He’s seen the kind of courage she’s had to work up before. It means a lot, coming from him. He was her best friend before and that hasn’t changed. She tells him she didn’t have a choice. He said she’s always had a choice, but she always chose to come out. To herself, to him, to Will, to her parents, her friends/bosses. She always chooses to be herself. It’s why he loves her, he said. She smiles and gets back to work.   
  
In the morning, she walks in and catches sight of an LGBT patch sewn onto the hem of Jack’s favorite denim jacket. It definitely wasn’t there last night.  
  
Andrew asks if she’s learned that tricky key part yet, and she showed him that she has. He says that it would be nice to meet Amelia. He doesn’t need to tell her that they’ve all had girlfriends come to practice.  
  
They spent the next 15 minutes playing that part whilst Nate tried to fold his t-shirt sleeves up, to display the temporary rainbow flag tattoo on his bicep. He sees her watching, catches her eye, and smiles.  
  
A weight she almost didn’t know was there was lifted, and with the love and acceptance of her family, friends and coworkers, she felt strong enough to get through anything.   
  
By the end of the week, Emily was bringing her girlfriend in to meet her band.   
‘Grace, this is Andrew, Nate and Jack. You already know Will and Nattie. Guys, this is Grace. My girlfriend.’ Almost as soon as they’re all done shaking hands, Nate says, ‘So, we need to come up with a plan to stick it to that gossip rag’.   
Jack says ‘Yeah, we’ve got a few ideas. I know Emily said something about selling the real story to another magazine. Either something really gay, or their biggest competitor. Either will hit them where it hurts. Better yet, if you can ruin their ‘exclusive’.’   
For a moment, Millie looks petrified and Emily’s worried they’ll scare her off. Then she smiles and shrugs, ‘I love revenge and schemes. But let’s maybe do some good with it, too’. Between the seven of them, it isn’t hard to work out.   
  
Emily is gay. She’s also happy, and loved, and in love. And when two competing articles from totally separate magazines get published, she’s outed to the whole country. ‘Shout Out’s article is a few stalker shots and some half-baked theories about the two of them. ‘the Closet’ features a double page article with the true story of their love.   
  
In the bottom right hand corner is a note from the editor: ‘Amelia Grace and Emily have donated payment for this story to the Ally Coalition (www (dot) theallycoalition (dot) org)’.   
  
They’re both wearing jeans from Amelia Grace, and (prototype) merch shirts, courtesy of fun. . Amelia’s is black with the picture of a hand flipping the bird with the ring finger and Emily’s is black with white writing: ‘It’s all fun. and gay, ‘til someone loses their rights’.

 


End file.
